WHAT KATE DOES

A Recap and Some Other Thoughts on Season Six

As most fans of Lost know, when Damon Lindelof and J.J. Abrams took over the project, it was their intention to have Jack played by a big movie star in the pilot. The name most often cited is Michael Keaton for the role. Then, in what would have absolutely been a mindfuck of epic proportions, he was to be killed halfway through the first episode, only to be replaced by a kick-ass, female Jean Valjean named Kate Austen. ABC eventually balked at the idea of killing off a main character in the first episode. (Not that Lindelof and Cuse ever did.) But, Kate would remain an important and almost invisible leader of the 815 survivors.

And I suppose that’s why it’s more it hurts oh-so-much more to ignore the string of bad episodes that are specifically Kate centric. Seasons three through five gave us (in reverse order): Whatever Happened, Happened, The Little Prince, Eggtown, Left Behind and I Do. Not a particularly memorable one in the bunch.

Which brings us to What Kate Does, an episode that so quickly and so often does it’s best to take the show off the rails it seems like a deliberate effort made by the Horowitz and Kitsis writing duo.

Why don’t we just begin at the beginning:

Previously on Lost: the bomb goes off, Juliet dies, Sawyer’s pissed, the gang is abducted by the Temple Others, the spring isn’t clear, Sayid is drowned, Sayid is dead, Sayid isn’t dead. “What happened?”

We first see Lennon galloping to tell the Temple Others leader (who is named Dogen) that Sayid is alive. Sawyer thinks that’s total bullshit since poor Juliet had to die in a hole in the ground. He eventually broaches the subject of escape with Kate. As he does, we flash sideways to LA X and LAX where Kate has hijacked a cab with Claire in the back. Eventually, Kate boots Claire from the car and speeds away, never to see each other again. Right?

In the Temple, Miles informs the resurrected Sayid what he’s missed including the fact that Hurley has taken a leadership role. This would be totally fucking awesome if it wasn’t a complete lie. Hurley seems to have just as many responsibilities as he always had, only this time he’s not funny. Hurley also tells Sayid that the people who drowned him and continue to hold them against their will are in fact protecting them. (Every character now seems to be suffering from a pretty bad case of Stockholm Syndrome.)

Sawyer steals a gun and breaks out. Cut to Lost…

The Others, apparently, still have a very bad test of character to join their little club since the sadistic Aldo (Mac from It’s Always Sunny) is still around. Kate offers her tracking services to Lennon and Dogen in catching Sawyer with Jin tagging along. Lennon tells Kate how important getting Sawyer back is. Wait… What?

* = You can skip this but:

*First of all, why is getting Sawyer back so effing important? And second of all, Hey Lennon, guess what? You’re Others! You don’t need Kate, an ex-con who has never been helpful to you guys, to track Sawyer down. And then what happens anyway, of-fucking-course, she runs away with Jin. Nice job, Lennon and Dogen. Maybe this is why a little shit like Ben is your superior.

So anyways, then flash sideways to Kate pulling up to an auto repair shop and sticking a gun into so dude’s face again, only this time it’s to remove her handcuffs and she’s flirty. Maybe if she’d shot the guy on her way out, this scene would’ve worked but instead it just shows how silly this show can get some time by way of realism. She opens Claire’s suitcase and realizes she’s just been holding a pregnant young woman at gunpoint as well. Kate feels bad.

EWW! Flash sideways to Kate and Jack almost having a romantic moment. Yuck! If anyone is still into this relationship, I’d love to read a thought about that.

Sayid gets tested, which looks a lot like Dogen blowing a handful of ash over him, being severely electrocuted and having a red-hot poker pressed into his side. Lennon assures Sayid that he has passed this crazy fucking test and then immediately asks Dogen, “I just lied to him didn’t I?” To which Dogen replies, “Yes.”

AND HERE’S WHERE THINGS TAKE A TURN…

*Let’s hope I’m just over-reacting and this isn’t the point the season where I knew things were going to suck (ie. John Locke’s sweat lodge in seaon 3) but come on! Kate goes BACK to find Claire in the fucking taxi cab that has been hijacked with a deadly weapon, a gun, which is still beyond conspicuously concealed under her open, see-through white shirt! No wonder you are always on the run, Kate. You are the worst fugitive in TV history.

So okay, Kate goes to find Claire. Turns out, Aaron’s soon-to-be-adoptive parents didn’t show at the airport and Kate offers up a ride. (How long did Claire wait after the flight before just getting in a cab? Whatever.) So there’s like some bond that forms here and the music swells before flashing sideways to Kate, Jin, Aldo and Aldo’s nice friend, Justin on the Island.

Kate schools the Others on tracking which is pretty dumb. They then come upon one of not-Rousseau’s traps before Kate escapes with Jin. Back at the Temple, Sayid returns from his torture sessions sending Jack storming the leadership of the Temple Others. Eventually though, Jack, the total fucking wuss that he is, falls for another Others mind game and agrees to give Sayid a pill to stop an “infection.” “There is no literal translation,” Lennon tells us.

Sayid isn’t a zombie, Sayid says. Yeah, that’s what all zombies say! Jack comes in and shoos away Miles and Hurley, the new survivor leader away. Sayid says he’ll take the pill of Jack asks him to.

Jin wants to go back to the Temple in hopes of finding the Ajira 316 flight and Sun. Kate just wants to go catch up with Sawyer and, I don’t know, live off the land maybe. Jin has become a really awesome character since he’s had to track down Sun through time and he learned how to speak English. I don’t know what kind of commentary that is on assimilation but it makes Jin a really fulfilling character after five seasons of only sporadic coolness.

In LA, Kate and Claire drive to Aaron’s soon-to-be-not-adoptive parents in a not awful Thelma and Louise routine. The woman, Lindsey Baskum, says that her husband has left her and she won’t be able to raise the baby. Claire, so shocked, goes into a false labor. (In much the same way she did on the Island originally.)

Back on the Island, Kate comes upon Sawyer digging up his floor boards in his New Otherton house. Sawyer pulls out a velvet bag before Kate alerts him of her presence. The two have their first real moment together since James jumped out of the chopper on the way to the Kahana. I miss Juliet, but these two are still pretty wonderful together.

And just like that, Kate is pulling up that fucking stolen taxi cab, sticking the US Marshall’s gun into the waistband of her jeans for all to see.

Kate seems scared of the cops but she’s more scared that Claire not getting the care she needs in the Intensive Care Unit. So, because Kate knows better than the goddamn ICU nurses around, she goes out and grabs the first doctor she sees. This turns out to be Dr. Goodspeed aka. the Other man aka. Ethan Rom. I’ve nothing to add on what the heck he’s doing here or what’s going on, but eerily similar to Desmond on the plane though, wasn’t it?

Aaron wants to be born but Claire isn’t ready. In a thrilling moment, the heartrate monitor flatlines and for a brief moment, it seemed like Aaron might be in serious trouble. Luckily, nothing happens and Aaron had just shifted position or something. But, Claire does call out “Aaron,” asking if the as-of-yet unnamed baby is okay. He is.

Sawyer and Kate talk on the New Otherton dock. Sawyer was going to ask Juliet to marry him. Sawyer cries. Awesome. Kate cries. Eh.

Dogen plays with a baseball. Jack isn’t amused. Dogen says he doesn’t need a translator but has one because he has to keep himself separate from those he governs. (I thought it was because he didn’t like the taste of English on his tongue?) Dogen says he wasn’t born on the island but was “brought here like everyone else.” When Jack asks him what that means, he replies, “You know exactly what that means.” Sweet, until…

After fighting some more about the stupid pill, Jack takes it himself. Dogen then beats the shit of him (JUST SPIT OUT THE STUPID PILL, DUMMY!) before Jack finally relents he onslaught of pill taking. Jack spits it out and asks what’s in the pill again. “Poison,” Dogen says. C’mon Lost…

*So if Kate is a terrible criminal, she is only matched by the bumbling Detective Rassmussen and her deputy that come to visit Claire in the hospital. The LAPD ask a question or two before leaving. Kate then finally decides it might be a good idea to get out of there. Claire, the perfect abductee she is, offers Kate her credit card and a friendship was formed forever.

(Let’s all hope Claire goes to visit her Dad in LA and instead meets up with her half-brother, Jack. That sounds great, Becky!)

Even Lennon’s shocked when he finds out Jack took the pill. Jack asks why they want to kill Sayid. Closest translations? He’s been “claimed.” What happens if the infection speads to far? He’ll be lost forever, like Jack’s sister…

Back out in the woods, Jin is on his way back to the Temple when Aldo and Justin attack. Jin makes a run for it, stepping on what could only be one of Claire’s bear traps in the process. Aldo is about to kill Jin before he and Justin are cut down in a barrage of gunfire. Jin turns around to see a rifle toting badass with filthy hair named Claire, her first non-flashback appearance on the Island since the end of Season 4.

LOST

First of all:

Season six looks to be off to a great start with a few minor, but noticeable, exceptions. The first and foremost of which, I would argue, is the completely lame set of Others who reside at the Temple. The Temple was touted in previous seasons as being the ultimate Other escape hatch. For Christ sakes, it’s where Ben sent his fucking daughter when Keamy and Co. were baring down on New Otherton in Season 4. So the idea that it’s run by these jokers is a real let down.

Others thoughts:

• Flash sideways still sounds so cool.
• Is Arzt going to be around a lot now?
• Omni-Locke and Ben storyline sorely missed.
• It’s poison! Who cares if it’s taken willingly?!
• What is Dr. Goodspeed up to?
• Aaron’s death in Altern-815 would really show us how wrong it was for them to make it to LAX.
• “Some of us are meant to be alone,” Sawyer says. Sawyer reverting to his old nihilist ways is even better now that it’s marked by some very recent, very real pain.
• Dogen’s baseball. Anything to do with Locke’s Dali Lama test in Cabin Fever?
• “I was brought here like everyone else,” Dogen. I believe, this really needs to be the overall thrust of the entire sixth season or Lost as an enterprise may have all been for naught.

PS.

Was that Bernard Nadler in “The Forgotten” and Juliet Burke in “V?” So does ABC have a deal to make sure everyone gets on a show if they finish their Lost tour? Daniel Dae Kim was just signed to the new “Hawaii 5-0” remake also an ABC show. Also, does just hearing about these actors going to new shows and new roles make you feel kind of sad? Season 3 finale all over again. They have to go back!